The Secret to a Happy Marriage 💕
This is a medium-length chapter.
This chapter contains some ideas and recommendations that I think go well with chastity and orgasm control, but you do you!
Finally, release day has come around! Now it’s his turn, for once! On release days, his excitement will probably be so high that bringing him to climax can take as little as a few seconds. Sometimes he will come just by taking the cage off... In which case, job done, and back in he goes!
Stick to your own desires and preferences when you think about how to give him his release. Don’t be afraid to be creative, and always remember to re-lock him as soon as possible after you’re finished.
If you enjoy giving blowjobs, or if they’re his favourite and you want to really spoil him on release days, then go for it. Personally, I don’t do it as often as I used to before we started chastity (only when I’m in the mood for it). Sometimes I tease him about the fact that he goes down on me all the time but I rarely reciprocate.
It’s absolutely fine to let him come inside you if that’s what you want or if it’s important for him. However, in my opinion there is some merit to not always letting him ejaculate during intercourse. When sex and ejaculation are separated it lets him focus on you.
He should always try his best to satisfy you and he should never come without your permission – even if you normally allow him to come every time you have sex. Even if it’s an accident or you don’t really mind, it goes against the core idea of male chastity play that he should try to control himself and only ejaculate when you want him to. If it happens, consider cancelling his next planned release or keeping him “pussyfree” until further notice. One of the women I spoke to even makes her boyfriend pay her a (consensual) “illegal ejaculation tax”. (If your husband tries his best but struggles to last, he can wear a numbing condom or a penis sleeve (see picture) during sex to help him last longer and avoid accidents.)
My husband and me have sex regularly, but it’s about my needs and ejaculation is never expected. After I’ve had my orgasm (or two), we cuddle for a while to feel closer to each other. I really enjoy these moments. Once his erection has calmed down, he puts the chastity device back on and then we either chat a bit or roll over and fall asleep. Sometimes I allow him to take care of himself before re-locking. When I occasionally allow him to finish inside me, he really enjoys going down on me afterwards until I feel clean again. This is an incredibly erotic and intimate act for both of us, and it was originally his idea!
Many women simply allow their man to jerk off on release day. He should ideally do it in your presence, rather than alone. A fun idea is to give him “jerk off instructions” – tell him how to do it.
It’s your game – you’ve got control of the joystick and he’s here for your fun. You can decide to give him a drawn-out, sensual handjob to really let him enjoy his release, or if you feel kinky and think he’d enjoy it you can add some “femdom” aspects to spice things up – below are some examples of this.
This can be a lot of fun if you both like it. Ask your husband if any of these ideas excite him:
This is when you stimulate him until just before the “point of no return” and then remove your hand and completely stop all stimulation just before he orgasms. If you time it right, instead of ejaculating in “bursts”, the semen flows effortlessly down the penis – hence they are also misleadingly called “ruined” orgasms. When done correctly, he will still be horny afterwards and will stay hard as a rock, still wanting more, even though he just came. If, like many women, you find it difficult to predict his “point of no return” before he orgasms, you can instead do the next best thing and simply let go of his penis right at the beginning of his ejaculation.
You may want to keep him guessing – don’t let him know beforehand whether you intend to give him a touchless or “normal” orgasm.
“I found ruined orgasms super hot from the very beginning. I think, as women, we’re conditioned to “complete the job”. I’ve always wanted to make my husband cum as hard as possible. I didn’t know that sometimes a ruined orgasm is MORE satisfying to my partner than a traditional one – psychologically, at least. With a ruined orgasm, I still get the visual I want. I still made him orgasm. But I also keep him horny and desperate, which I LOVE. Ruined orgasms keep the sexual energy high.” – shortened quote from Happylocking↗
“We have moved towards only ruined orgasms for him as I decided that he shouldn’t release “fully” anymore. Handjobs, blowjobs and even sex now end in a ruined orgasm for him. I really enjoy ruining all his orgasms and I think it has been way better for him as well. After a “full” orgasm, he used to not be in the mood to be relocked and it would take him a few days to get back into the swing of things. Now he might be upset for a moment when I ruin him, but he’s back to normal in minutes, not days! He never asks for chastity breaks anymore and he is enjoying it more!” – from Jane (via email)
“I really don’t miss a normal orgasm. When I am allowed release through my wife’s hand I only last around 20 seconds from start to completion. For the last two years, all my releases have been “ruined”. After going so long without a “normal” orgasm, the ruined orgasms now feel normal and intense to me, and I like that they let me stay horny and enjoy licking up my own mess when instructed by her.” – shortened quote from quickcuckhub↗
“The so-called “ruined” orgasm is one of the most intensely pleasurable tricks you can use in the bedroom to drive your man into an animal sexual frenzy. The name is misleading: it’s still an orgasm! A properly ruined orgasm is STILL potentially more intense than a normal orgasm! It’s not “ruined” at all! Don’t feel bad about ruining your man’s orgasm! I simply cannot say it enough.
Basically, a ruined orgasm (or three) multiplies his sexual endurance for the rest of the night, without reducing his desire.
To bend your man’s brain and give him truly epic ruined orgasms, you need to know his body very, very well. You need to study his specific sequence of escalating physical pleasure signals, to identify the first possible moment in the sequence where you can let go and cause him to still cascade through climax. Arched back, tensed muscles, grunts, whimpers, pulsing cock, retracted balls – every man has his signals. Instead of letting go at the last second you actually want to let go as early as possible. You want him to hang, untouched, on the verge of climax, for as long as physically possible, before his body reflexively sends him over. However, men always misjudge their own point-of-no-return. In order to find his true point-of-no-return, you need to study the cascade of physical reactions happening in his body until you find the point where he lingers for 5 to 15 seconds, untouched, before leaking uncontrollably. Basically the power of his “cumshot” is a clue to help you know if you’re doing it right (weaker is better).
Do it correctly, and his cum should just dribble out, under weak contractions. Another huge clue that you’re doing it right will be in his refractory period – or lack of one. After a typical good ruined orgasm, his cock should not wilt at all. He should stay aroused, erect, and eager for more action.
I allow him to have orgasms, but he can only have them on my terms. I can choose to “finish” him. Or I can choose to “ruin” him. He gives that choice to me, willingly, lovingly, every time.”
– shortened quote from this great article ↗:
credit to Recklessdome ↗
The chastity device will prevent erections and most penile stimulation, but some men can still ejaculate without being unlocked if they haven’t come in a very long time and are extremely aroused. This can happen with minimal physical contact, such as gently squeezing his balls or teasing his dick through the bars of the chastity cage, and maybe even through mere mental stimulation, for example when he’s really enjoying going down on you. A few men even manage to have “wet dreams”. Either way, he’ll most likely remain quite unsatisfied and horny afterwards.
Pressing a strong vibrator against the cage or testicles may lead to ejaculation, and for some women this is actually their preferred way of giving him a release.
Many men also enjoy getting “pegged” (penetrated) by their partners which can lead to – apparently very pleasurable – prostate orgasms. This can be a lot of fun for both participants and it also helps maintain good prostate health.
You have finished all of the core chapters! Your husband is going to be amazed!